Advertisement In A Long Island Shop:Guitar, for sale....... cheap....... ....no strings attached.
Ad.. In Hospital Waiting Room: Smoking Helps You Lose Weight ... One Lung At A Time!
Seen on a bulletin board:Success Is Relative. More The Success, More The Relatives.
Quote on a internet site:When I Read About The Evils Of Drinking...I Gave Up Reading.
Quote on a internet site:My Grandfather Is Eighty And Still Doesn't Need Glasses... He Drinks Straight Out Of The Bottle.
Quote on a internet site:You Know Your kids Have Grown Up When: Your Daughter Begins To Put On Lipstick.. Or Your Son Starts To Wipe It Off.
Sign In A Bar:"Those Of You Who Are Drinking To Forget, Please Pay In Advance."
Sign In Driving School:If Your Wife Wants To Learn To Drive, Don't Stand In Her Way.
Sigh In a Divorce solicitors office waiting room:Getting Caught Is The Mother Of Invention.
Sign in a Drugstore window:Laugh And The World Laughs With You, Snore And You sleep Alone. (stop snore patches).
The Surest Sign That Intelligent Life Exists Elsewhere In The Universe Is The Fact That It Has Never Tried To Contact Us.
Sign At A Barber's Saloon In Detroit: We Need Your Heads To Run Our Business.
Sign In A Restaurant:All Drinking Water In This Establishment Has Been Personally Passed By The Manager.
Sign On A Famous Beauty Parlor Window:Don't Whistle At The Girls Going Out From Here with her back turned to you. She May Be Your Grandmother !
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