John O'Reilly hoisted his beer and said 'here's to spending the rest of me life between the legs of me wife'
That won him the top prize at the pub for the best toast of the night
He went home and told his wife Mary 'I won the prize for the best toast of the night'
She said 'aye, did ye now. And what was your toast?'
John said 'here's to spending the rest of me life sitting in church beside me wife'
'Oh that is very nice indeed John' Mary said
The next day Mary ran into one of John's drinking buddies on the street corner
The man chuckled leeringly and said 'John won the prize the other night at the pub with a toast about you Mary'
She said 'aye, he told me, and I was a bit surprised myself. You know, he's only been there twice in the last four years. Once he fell asleep, and the other time I had to pull him by the ears to make him come'
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