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Monday, 30 June 2008

Priceless photos to treasure and look back on. . .

Why you should never leave the house without your knickers. . .

Great Wedding photo, one to treasure and look back on. . .

Thursday, 26 June 2008

UN B E L I E V A B L E. .Only the Americans can do it so well and crazily. . lol x x




Tuesday, 24 June 2008

DRUNK WHO ME. . .N e v e r ! !

A squirrel in a Minneapolis neighborhood was drunk from eating fermented pumpkins, and just could not climb the tree. THIS SQUIRREL WAS FINE THE NEXT DAY. . .

Drunk African animals after they eat lots of fermented Amarulas. . .

Sunday, 22 June 2008

What is it all about. . .I read this and though OWWWW SO TRUE...What would you do?

A man asks you out for the first date. You're all nervous and excited because you think he's hot. Your heart starts beating faster when he gets close and you wonder if he's going to kiss you.

Then he does. And the thrill shoots all the way to your toes.

Each new touch, every new intimacy flushes adrenalin into your system, makes you hyperaware of his hands, his mouth, his eyes, his scent.

Then you find yourself naked, flat on your back, or bent over the nearest available surface. You feel the head of his cock prod your opening and a flood of chemicals surge through your bloodstream.

He trusts, you counter, and soon he's buried inside of you for the very first time. Stretching you, filling you.

Solid. Real.

Your nipples tighten, a wash of fluid leaks out of your pussy, your breathing deepens.

Then he moves. Your bodies work together in an age old dance that takes you to places no other activity on earth can take you.

One day you wake up and realize the thrill is gone. The sex is good, even great, but that adrenalin dumping thrill has abandoned you.

And you want to feel it again.

Do you dump the guy and go on the hunt for a new one? Or do you throw yourself into the relationship you've got, and learn just how intense an orgasm can really be between two partners that know each other, and have an emotional investment? LOVE. . .

ONE READERS COMMENT...from a guy...surprize surprize. . !!

"While novel is always exciting and casual sex is a completely different animal (in a good way), having an emotional investment takes porking to another level for me. I love loving who I'm shagging (or being shagged by).

Sunday Blues...this should make you laugh. . x x


I'm driving along on the highway
At 65 miles an hour
(the speed limit), minding my own business,
When outta nowhere there's
This big crack in my windshield!!

I swerved right,
And then left,
And it was still right there!!

There just ain't NO words for this!...


Saturday, 21 June 2008

Actual sign ads/Qotes on the internet... with a great sence of humor. . .

Advertisement In A Long Island Shop:Guitar, for sale....... cheap....... strings attached.

Ad.. In Hospital Waiting Room: Smoking Helps You Lose Weight ... One Lung At A Time!

Seen on a bulletin board:Success Is Relative. More The Success, More The Relatives.

Quote on a internet site:When I Read About The Evils Of Drinking...I Gave Up Reading.

Quote on a internet site:My Grandfather Is Eighty And Still Doesn't Need Glasses... He Drinks Straight Out Of The Bottle.

Quote on a internet site:You Know Your kids Have Grown Up When: Your Daughter Begins To Put On Lipstick.. Or Your Son Starts To Wipe It Off.

Sign In A Bar:"Those Of You Who Are Drinking To Forget, Please Pay In Advance."

Sign In Driving School:If Your Wife Wants To Learn To Drive, Don't Stand In Her Way.

Sigh In a Divorce solicitors office waiting room:Getting Caught Is The Mother Of Invention.

Sign in a Drugstore window:Laugh And The World Laughs With You, Snore And You sleep Alone. (stop snore patches).

The Surest Sign That Intelligent Life Exists Elsewhere In The Universe Is The Fact That It Has Never Tried To Contact Us.

Sign At A Barber's Saloon In Detroit: We Need Your Heads To Run Our Business.

Sign In A Restaurant:All Drinking Water In This Establishment Has Been Personally Passed By The Manager.

Sign On A Famous Beauty Parlor Window:Don't Whistle At The Girls Going Out From Here with her back turned to you. She May Be Your Grandmother !

aawwwwwh...and who said animals don't get along

Ever have one of those days, when something seemed a bit "off" but you just couldn't put your finger on it...

Or it seemed like all the people around you just wanted to butt heads...

Or just get into some kind of weird tug of war?

Sometimes you just need to take a fresh new look and get a different perspective on things.

Remember to try your best to show kindness to others...

sometimes looking at things from their perspective might help...)

So, when life gets you down...

Remember to just keep going, and keep your head above water...

And you'll get by with a little help from your friends!

To all of my friends have a nice day.. . Together We Can Make Someone Smile !

Thursday, 19 June 2008

When you are feeling alone like no one cares, read this coz its absolutely true:

Every night, at least one person/someone thinks about you before they go to sleep or when they awake.

At least one person loves you unconditionaly with all their heart in a life time.

The only reason someone returns a good deed without conditions because of your good heartness.

There are at least two people in this world that would die for you, because you mean the world to them.

When you make the biggest mistake ever, something good tends to comes from it.

When you think the world has turned its back on you, take a look.

Its not a weak man that admits he is wrong or just saying S O R R Y, but a strong one.

Always remember the compliments you've received. Forget the rude remarks.

See the positives in life and not concentrate on the sheer negative ones.

Appreciate what you have then fret what you haven't as life is far too short than anyone of us know it.

So if you are a loving person, send this to everyone on your list. As someone who loves me did. .x x

Monday, 16 June 2008

What caption would you use?. . .all I can Say Poor Cow.



IS THE GRASS GREENER ON THE OTHER SIDE...(Was it worth the effort now)..

THIS IS HOW COWS DO IT. . (a song is running in my LETS FALL IN LOVE. . .





sorry could n't help myself having a mad one, on my own lol. . x x

Saturday, 14 June 2008

The winning Toast

John O'Reilly hoisted his beer and said 'here's to spending the rest of me life between the legs of me wife'

That won him the top prize at the pub for the best toast of the night

He went home and told his wife Mary 'I won the prize for the best toast of the night'

She said 'aye, did ye now. And what was your toast?'

John said 'here's to spending the rest of me life sitting in church beside me wife'

'Oh that is very nice indeed John' Mary said

The next day Mary ran into one of John's drinking buddies on the street corner

The man chuckled leeringly and said 'John won the prize the other night at the pub with a toast about you Mary'

She said 'aye, he told me, and I was a bit surprised myself. You know, he's only been there twice in the last four years. Once he fell asleep, and the other time I had to pull him by the ears to make him come'

Friday, 13 June 2008

Waaaa Haaaa. . .


CLEVER ART. . .I really love em'


Water Bottle Holder and Bum bag combined FP&P Item number: 140240958958 (some items just don't need modeling..believe me).

I COULDN'T BELIEVE MY EYES when I was on e-bay yesturday and came across this item advertising for sale.


It was advertised as free you wonder why? (sweaty from -ollocks too).

P.S I Was shopping for the boyfriend...His face when I asked him "what about this one then".

Thursday, 12 June 2008

Tuesday, 10 June 2008

For Joanne casey. . .A classic BBC1 comedy The Royle Family. . .

On the surface, The Royle Family appeared to be humdrum and low on incident - but such ordinary appearances belie the fact that it was a groundbreaking work of exceptional comedy invention.

The Royle Family

Writers Craig Cash and Caroline Aherne's knack of capturing every nuance of character and dialogue made the sitting room of the titular Royles a must-see for an ever-growing audience. Viewers simply dropped in to this Northern family's conversations and watched them channel-hop and discuss various everyday subjects.

Family patriarch Jim Royle is master of his space - unafraid to rearrange his nether regions, pick his nose or fart, regardless of the company. Ricky Tomlinson embraces the part with gusto, making Jim's oft delivered "My arse" a national catchphrase.

Frequently boorish, always laughing at his own jokes, and intent on announcing his lavatorial visits to all and sundry, Tomlinson made Jim impossible to dislike.

Because of Jim's indolence, it is his hard-working wife Barbara (Sue Johnson, reuniting with her former Brookside husband) who is the main breadwinner. She is the only one who sticks up for their oft picked-upon youngest son Anthony who is obliged to do any errand or drudgery without complaint.

Their daughter Denise and her henpecked husband David are ensconced on the family sofa even when they have a house of their own, as is Barbara's morbid, storytelling mother Norma (known as Nana).

All the characters in this show just seemed so right. The laughs appeared to come effortlessly (although, ever the perfectionist, Aherne reportedly agonised over every syllable), and there was no contrivance or slapstick to be found anywhere.

The Royle Family mined comedy from the mundanity of life, and brimmed with affection for its characters. Although infused with occasional moments of sentimentality, it was unflinching - never afraid to portray its characters with all their flaws apparent.

If one scene could sum the show up, it would be that of Denise and Jim on the bathroom floor after her waters have broken. Juxtaposing earthy humour ("Are you sure it's not just a bloody big piss, love?") with heartfelt emotion (Tomlinson breaking down in tears as he describes the unassailable love he felt at Denise’s birth) it is raw, tender, funny and heartbreakingly real.

Semi-regular characters popped in and out of the Royles' living room: yin and yang neighbours Mary and Joe (she cheery, he dreary), Anthony's wayward best mate Darren, Anthony's "posh" (she’s from Altrincham) vegetarian girlfriend Emma, and Denise's plump friend Cheryl.

The final special, some five years after the series had ended, finally escaped the confines of the house - but to hospital, where Nana finally passes away.

Nothing on television had been quite like The Royle Family It eschewed a laughter track and the traditional three-camera set-up, and was shot on 16mm film, the resulting grain adding to the dowdy atmosphere. Not only that, but it seemed to take place in real time.

It is unlikely this bold, unique and brilliant rewriting of what is possible in British comedy will be bettered.

Caroline AherneDenise Royle/BestSue JohnstonBarbara RoyleRicky TomlinsonJim RoyleRalf LittleAntony RoyleLiz SmithNorma SpeakmanCraig CashDave BestDoreen KeoghMary CarrollPeter MartinJoe CarrollJessica StevensonCheryl CarrollGeoffrey HughesTwiggySheridan SmithEmma KavanaghAndrew WhymentDarren Sinclair-JonesMatthew HughesBaby DavidJames HughesBaby DavidCrew
Caroline Ahernewriter
Craig Cashwriter
Henry Normalwriter
Carmel Morganwriter
Caroline Ahernedirector
Mark Myloddirector
Steve Bendelackdirector
Glenn Wilhideproducer
Kenton Allenproducer
Andy Harriesexecutive producerRelated LinksAlso on BBC Comedy
Early Doors
The Mrs Merton Show
Mrs Merton and Malcolm
Royle Family Wallpaper
Also on
TV Schedules
Beyond the BBC
The BBC is not responsible for the content of external websites.

Also is in....


WELL HOW'D YOU DO. . Try again...

I SPOTTED 11. . .(if i can do it so can you. . .) TRY AGAIN. .


Sunday, 8 June 2008

Emergency trip to Isti Towers. . . 21st April. The carrying of skirting boards from B&Q. . .N O T . . . BUSTED..Pinocchio. x x

ABSOLUTELY LOVE IT. . .In the words of Jim Royle "my arse". . LOL X X X

Ricky Tomlinson. . Takes a closer inspection and made everyone laugh with his usual inimitable catchphrase "My Ar....."from the series "The Royle Family"

Naught naughty. . .

A woman was having a daytime affair while her husband was at work. One rainy day she was in bed with her boyfriend when, to her horror, she heard her husband's car pull into the driveway.

"Oh my God - Hurry! Grab your clothes and jump out the window. My husband's home early!"

"I can't jump out the window. It's raining out there!"

"If my husband catches us in here, he'll kill us both!" she replied. "He's got a hot temper and a gun, so the rain is the least of your problems!"

So the boyfriend scoots out of bed, grabs his clothes & jumps out the window. Running down the street in the rain, he quickly discovered he had run right into the middle of the town's annual marathon, so he started running along beside the others, about 300 of them.

Being naked, with his clothes tucked under his arm, he tried to blend in as best he could. After a little while a small group of runners who had been watching him with some curiosity, jogged closer.

"Do you always run in the nude?" one asked. "Oh yes!" he replied, gasping for air. "I feel so wonderfully free!"

Another runner moved a long side. "Do you always run carrying your clothes with you under your arm?"

"Oh, yes" our friend answered breathlessly. "That way I can get dressed at the end of the run and get in my car to go home!

Then a third runner cast his eyes a little lower and asked, "Do you always wear a condom when you run?"

"Nope........just when it's raining."

Friday, 6 June 2008

How Sad. . . Bo Diddley dies...He will be missed

Legendary blues guitarist Bo Diddley has died aged 79 from heart failure.

Legendary blues guitarist Bo Diddley has died.The musician passed away from heart failure at his home in Archer, Florida, on Monday (02.06.08) aged 79, his spokesperson Susan Clary confirmed. Diddley had been in ill health for some time. He suffered a heart attack last August, just a few months after having a stroke while on tour.The guitarist, who was born Otha Ellas Bates, was famous for making his own square guitars, his distinctive live performances and his trademark dark glasses and black hat.

Diddley - whose father died shortly after he was born and was raised by his mother's cousin Gussie McDaniel after his 16-year-old mother could not care for him - claimed he got his iconic name from his school friends shortly after he moved from Mississippi to Chicago when he was six. The blues star, whose name was changed to Ellas McDaniel after Gussie became his legal guardian, previously said: "I don't know where they got it from, but the kids in grammar school gave me that name."
In the 1950s, Diddley was one of a host of musicians, including Chuck Berry and Little Richard, credited as being a founding father of the rock 'n' roll revolution due to his distinctive interpretation of rhythm and blues and gospel.

He influenced a host of bands and artists with The Beatles, The Rolling Stones, Eric Clapton and The Clash among many crediting him with having a major effect on their careers. The Strokes guitarist Albert Hammond Jr. paid tribute to Diddley, saying: "I think we are all fans of Bo Diddley's rhythm and style. So many artists have borrowed his simple, but powerful rhythms, his chocolate bar-shaped guitar. Bo Diddley, may you rest in piece and live on through future musicians."

He was inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame in 1987 and received a Grammy Lifetime Achievement Award in 1998 in recognition of his incredible contribution to music. His most famous songs include 'Bo Diddley', 'Who Do You Love?', 'Uncle John', 'Say Man' and 'Ride On Josephine'.

Thursday, 5 June 2008

Only a mother can love. . . . Can you be that Mother?

Dear All

My friends cousin's cat had kittens and she was able to give away all but 4 of them.I told her I would help her find homes for the last 4.

I can't take one because I have 3 cats already, but if you could take just one it would be such a help and the kittens could have a nice home.

Since she lives by the Nuclear Power Plant, I'll go pick them up for you.

I've attached pictures of the last 4 kittens. Can you given one of them a home and help a fortunate little kit?


chazza x x